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Griff the Invisible (2010)


Rating: PG-13
Runtime: 90 minutes
Genre: Comedy | Drama | Romance | Sci-Fi
Country: Australia Australia
Director: Leon Ford
Writer: Leon Ford
Stars: Ryan Kwanten, Maeve Dermody and Marshall Napier


Griff – office worker by day, superhero by night – has his world turned upside down when he meets Melody, a beautiful young scientist who shares his passion for the impossible.

Alpha’s Canceled – Another Top Quality Show Bites the Dust

Keeping with tradition Syfy has axed another great Sci-Fi series with the age old piss weak poor ratings excuse. Who do they give these Nielsen boxes to anyway?? Retirement homes? Christian fundamentalists?? If they bothered to take things like downloads, legal or otherwise or DVR recordings they just might find that their fan base is a shit load bigger than they realise. The fact they leave truly awful rubbish like Merlin or Vampire Diaries on for years just boggles the mind even more. What are you guys smoking???

Okay so the show was far from perfect and the plot devices certainly went sideways in the second half of Season 2 but at least the show was engaging and challenging. Personally I would have gone rogue way back at the end of Season 1 when Dr Rosan brought the Alphas out of the closet so to speak. When the US Government starts killing innocent people for having special abilities it’s time to pull out the big guns shoot the fuck back.


Syfy released this official statement: “Syfy has decided not to renew Alphas for a third season. We’ve been proud to present this entertaining, high-quality series for two seasons and to work with an incredible ensemble of talented actors, producers and creatives as well as our partners at BermanBraun Television.  We’d like to thank the show’s dedicated regular viewers for their tremendous support.”

Maybe it’s time the networks look at better and more relevant ways to come up with ratings.

Tomorrowland – Previously Tilted 1952

A lot of speculation is beginning to circulate around the interweb relating to Tomorrowland, the forthcoming project from director Brad Bird and writers Jeff Jensen and Damon Lindelof. The most interesting rumor of all (and this is pretty crazy even by Hollywood standards) is that the project is based on actual archival documents and items that were alledgedly the beginning stages of development for a “real” movie disclosing the existence of aliens. This giant leap was made due to the fact that Disney did actually indeed produce Top Secret training videos for the US Military way back in the 50′s. Could this actually be the disclosure event that UFO enthusiasts have been squealing for for the last five decades? Fuck no. Why will true disclosure never happen? Because then the world would finally know with absolute certainty that Governments are the lying bastards we’ve suspected they are all along and most importantly there would be mass pandemonium not only because our Governments have lied to us all our lives, but because our tiny monkey brains won’t be able to cope with not being God’s favorite offspring. What about the aliens? Meh!! Try convincing me they don’t exist. Besides they are much more likely to be benign than interested in sticking foreign objects up our stinky assholes. Anyway…. I digress that whole pile of crazy is a subject for another day. What’s in the box? Fuck knows. Well, Damon and Jeff know so spit it out boys give us something we can use.

Dredd 3D (2012)

Action | Crime | Sci-Fi
Runtime: 95 min
Release Date: 21 September 2012 (USA)
IMDB Rating: 7.1/10
Metascore: 59/100

In a violent, futuristic city where the police have the authority to act as judge, jury and executioner, a cop teams with a trainee to take down a gang that deals the reality-altering drug, SLO-MO.

Director:Pete Travis
Writers:John Wagner
Stars: Karl Urban, Olivia Thirlby, Lena Headey

Branded (2012)

Branded 2012

Rating: R
Runtime: 90 minutes
Genre: Drama | Fantasy | Thriller | Sci-Fi
Country: Russia ru
Director: Jamie Bradshawm & Aleksandr Dulerayn
Writers: Jamie Bradshawm & Aleksandr Dulerayn
Stars: Ed Stoppard, Leelee Sobieski and Jeffrey Tambor

On the surface this film is a very unsubtle fuck you to advertising, capitalism, communism and consumerism. Fair enough, all of those things are evil in their own right. But under the surface there is more, much more, to be gleaned from quite a personal and powerful message because this film isn’t just about the horrors of consumerism but it’s also about how each of us is responsible for his or her own fate and how the choices we make even on the smallest scale can have such a huge impact on other people even when we believe we are doing the right thing. Oh and it’s about redemption too.
Misha Galkin (Ed Stoppard) is a high flying and successful Marketing guru who seemingly ruins a young girls’ life after an Extreme Makeover reality show goes sideways when she slips into a coma after the surgery procedure. And so begins the ominous conspiracy to make “fat” the new “sexy”. After much soul searching and a good old fashioned dream vision (presumably from the God Taurus) Misha performs a bloody red bull sacrifice (I wonder if the reference to the energy drink was intentional) which allows him to see things as they “truly” are.
This movie was like a visit to my University days when I was studying Marketing and dropping a ton of acid. The big “evil” corporations literally took on the appearance of living breathing monsters feeding off our most basic primal desires. While the big megacorporations of today may not actually be giant evil rampaging psychedelic monsters (or are they?), the analogy is very fitting if not slightly contrived and absurd. In the end it doesn’t matter if anyone else can see the monsters or not because the end result is the same as the only man that can see through the veil of illusion is also the only one that can break it. So, Misha fights back by literally killing the other brands with other “healthier” brands. When the Government intervenes after the political and public backlash advertising is banned altogether and the war seems won.
All in all I really enjoyed this film. Sure it’s absurd and contrived and about as subtle as a kick in the vagina but the messages are all offered with the best of intentions. Despite its flaws such as the disjointed plot, self indulgent rants and what the fuck was the point of Max Von Sydow’s character?, there’s a lot of good material in this film and I just love the irony of how it was advertised like a Hollywood blockbuster but played out like a trippy arthouse film. Well done guys. Well done.


Alphas – Season 3 in Limbo


Syfy was due to announce the fate of Alphas late December 2012. To date there is no offcial word one way of the other but the cast themselves are not terribly optomistic. Ryan Cartwright who plays the fantastic super nerd Gary recently tweeted “Gonna assume #Alphas is cancelled. #TooLongToWait :( “. Not a good sign.

So is Alphas fated to the garbage bin like every other decent Sci-FI show? It still boggles my mind how shit like blah or blah are still on air. Is Hollywood run by 16 year old Christian, Right Wing Republicans? WTF?

OK so the show isn’t perfect but it did cover some pretty cool material like when the Alpha agents go all rogue and torture that fire alpha guy. Cause if some mutant asshole had my girlfriend or daughter hostage shit would be getting real real, real fast.

World War Z – A Real Hollywood Horror Story


World War Z seems to be turning into a disaster of apocolyptic proportions. Something rank and foul seems to be haunting Hollywood these days. First there were the casting issues with Mathew Fox being added to the cast, then withdrawing from the role, then coming back. Ed Harris was also cast but also withdrew the film. Then there was the international “incident” when a Hungarian SWAT team shut down the production after learning that illegal weapons were being used on set. Then there was the was the rewrites pushing the release date from December 21, 2012, to June 21, 2013. Then there was the 7 weeks of reshoots required after filming was completed because, apparently the last act was so awful. With several writers being brought in then mysteriously disappearing it seemed Paramount had finally settled on Damon Lindelof, Hollywoods flavor of the month. Only now it seems Damon has better things to do and has delegated the unenviable task to Drew Goddard, writer of the excellent and much under rated Cabin in the Woods.

It appears that there are some rather serious issues going on in the movie industry at the moment. Poor scripting, bad marketing, over budgeting and bad management. While these issues are hardly anything new, you might think that by now Hollywood might be better at fixing them. Remember any story can be made to be compelling, it’s all about how you tell it.

Assassin’s Creed – Coming to the Silver Screen!!


Assassin’s Creed is finally going to be made into a movie! The extremely popular series of videogames is now coming to the big screen, and as the famous assassin (well, there are quite a few, as AC players already know), will be none other than Michael Fassbender (currently seen in Ridley Scott’s Prometheus) set to star in and co-produce Assassin’s Creed (through his DMC film company), based on the popular Ubisoft videogame franchise.

According to Variety:

“Plot revolves around a man who learns his ancestors were trained assassins after he is kidnapped by a secret org with ties to the Knights Templar, and sent back in time to retrieve historical artifacts.”

We think that the ”man” in question might be Desmond Miles, the 21st-century character through which players are reliving the adventures of Miles’ genetic ancestors, the various assassins of the games: Altaïr (during the Crusades), Ezzio Auditore (the Renaissance) and, later, in Assassin’s Creed III, coming out this fall, Connor Kenway (the American Revolution).

“Michael Fassbender was our first choice” to play the franchise’s iconic hooded hero, said Jean-Julien Baronnet, CEO of Paris-based Ubisoft Motion Pictures. “Michael (Fassbender) is an extremely smart, talented, versatile and committed actor.”

The games have been faltering somewhat ever since the release of Assassin’s Creed 2. While sales have been excellent for the series purists, like myself, haven’t been so enthusiastic about the dramatic game play changes and with Assassin’s Creed III due fo rrelease later this year it looks to be an even bigger move away from the original style of the game.

Even so, last fall Ubisoft was in talks with Sony to develop a series of films based on the successful Assassin’s Creed games, but the companies put the project on hold.
Now Ubisoft is planning to stick to its initial plan and develop the film independently, much as Marvel did with its comic-book properties Iron Man, Thor, Captain America and the Avengers films so that it can maintain creative control over the product. Which is awesome news becuase most videogame movie adaptations have been rather poor copies of the great games they’ve spawned from. For example, Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time, Doom the Resident Evil films and, to a lesser extent, Silent Hill. So let’s hope that with Ubisoft’s major involvement in the Assassin’s Creed films, we’ll get a brilliant and rather faithful adaptation on the big screen.

That and with Fassbender, who’s an incredibly talented, brilliant and intense actor in the mix, we have a pretty good feeling the Assassin’s Creed movie might just turn out to be super fucking awesome.

Twilight Fan Meets Tragic End Waiting for Comic-Con


Image Courtesy of JB

In what appears to be a case of the universe course correcting itself, a 53-year-old Twilight fan named Gisella has died while waiting in line to enter Comic-Con. The event has yet to start but as usual hardcore fans and Twihards from everywhere have been camping out for days for a pole position spot to make a run for the Twilight panel when it opens. According to reports the woman was moving in line when she was struck by a vehicle. We can only assume that the line invloved crossing a road, unless people in the US have started driving on the side walk. The driver of the vehicle stayed on scene but will likely be traumatised by the event. It seems that even the universe must protect itself because it goes against all the known laws of physics and reality to be a Twilight fan and to be Twilight fan over 12 years old is so wrong the universe could disintegrate and reality as we know it cease to exist. So Twlight fans beware, if you are over 12 the universe will hunt you down and kill you. You cannpot run, you cannot hide. And besides a magical being that sparkles and walks around during the day is not a fucking vampire. It’s probably a fairy and everybody knows fairies are gay.

Batman – The Cape Just Don’t Fly


“Batman could fly, but he wouldn’t survive the landing because his wingspan is too short,” according to researchers.